Reflections On My First Imperial Massage Experience

1. It is the massage equivalent of Chinese takeout
2. Like takeout, it helped my hangover but I feel gross now
3. Nothing about that place screamed dirty, but then again, nothing screamed overly hygienic
4. Walking in and seeing 30 people zoned out getting massages in a small room was very Inception-Matrix like
5. Hearing 30 people whispering in Chinese to each other in a dark room was unnerving and seemed nefarious
6. Someone, I’m not saying who, was sick
7. I doubt any of them have formal, let alone advanced, training in reflexology
8. The “bed” I was in sounded like a creaky old wooden warship
9. My shoes were moved at least three times
10. I don’t really have a tenth thought

Score: 7.5/10 – Would recommend. Maybe not to a good friend, but to friend of a friend or someone of similar familiarity.