Found: Pair of Boxers at GF’s Apt

Hi Everyone,

Got back in town after some travel and found pair of boxers at my girlfriends. She swears she has no idea how they got there, so I’m turning to craigslist to see if we can help find the owner of said pair of boxers.

Brief description:
Old Navy, Size Small, Navy Blue, with Skiers on them doing acrobatics (see picture)

Description of who I can gather we’re looking for…

*The Old Navy bit* I don’t know any grown men who shop at old navy, so I’m guessing the owner’s mother is buying their underwear. Ahh, good, first clue, we’re looking for a mama’s boy.

*Size Men’s Small* You know what they say about small hands right? Small dick. Who even wears small? I’m really going to be disappointed if my gf is banging a circus midget.

*Navy Blue* The only reason men wear dark boxers is they are afraid of skid marks, and I don’t mean from bike tires.

*Skiers* I’ve always said keep who you want to be on your underwear. This is why all of my boxer briefs I have hundred dollar bills, a 2007 100′ twin mast Spirit Yacht sailboat, and scantily-clad women. Living in Fayetteville wearing skiing boxers is like living in Minnesota wearing palm tree boxers. We covet what we can’t or don’t have. Maybe this man-boy has delusions of being a skier? I’m not sure.

So to wrap it up – if you know a mama’s boy, with a small dick, who shits his pants, and has hopes of being a stick figure skier, please have them shoot me an email and we’ll get right to the bottom of this.

Thanks,
Jason